In my first years as a stepmom, I’d get so anxious that my hands would shake.
When my husband Darren would update me on the latest co-parenting disagreement, I wouldn’t be able to think about anything else. I was consumed.
I felt like I had no control. My life was dictated by a legal agreement I had no part in creating.
I was so confused about my role.
I was supposed to be a parent, but remember I wasn’t the parent.
I felt damned if I did, damned if I didn’t.
I was good enough until I was not. A glorified babysitter.
His ex made me feel so anxious and insecure. One time I even hid behind a fence so that she wouldn’t see me. She did.
My husband and I were fighting, I was starting to resent the changes in my life. I even questioned my decision to say yes to marrying a man with three kids and an ex.
It wasn’t good.
Then one day I made the decision that changed my life forever.
I decided that this was not going to be my life. I was not going to feel like this anymore. I was going to do the work on myself and my family. I was going to find a way to live the life that I wanted to live, amongst the extra stress that came with being a stepmom.
If you’re reading this right now, chances are you can relate.
My beautiful friend, making that simple decision changed everything. After a lot of work on myself and my family, my mission is to help you get here too.
This is not some fluffy claim either. It’s possible.
The first thing you need to do is understand that change starts with you.
Yes I said you.
Forgot about all the ways people in your life are affecting all the things, and start to focus on yourself. Your reactions, your insecurities, your triggers. I know this may seem counter-productive, but this is the key.