How To Recover From A Major (or Minor) Screw-Up

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I’m a wife, stepmom x3 and mom x 1. When I couldn’t find the stepmom support I was looking for, decided to create it myself. I love mac + cheese, distressed denim, sauvignon blanc and all things Dateline. 

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Today I want to talk about screwing up.

As someone who has screwed up in some pretty monumental ways, throughout my 32 years, it’s a topic that I am quite familiar with.

Seriously, there have been several times in my life where I have been a “total screw up”, and I’m not afraid to say it. 

Why? Because we all screw up. Some of us more than others, but no one is perfect. 

Whether you’ve said something in a way that unintentionally hurt someone’s feelings
Made a decision that hurt or negatively impacted another person
Flat out made a BAD decision
Were just a complete a-hole 

or

Acted emotionally, said said something you shouldn’t have, screwing up is human nature.

The question is, what do you do once you’ve done it? (and can’t take it back)

What do you do when you’re embarrassed or ashamed or second guessing the way you went about something?

The answer? 

Own it.
Apologize.
Find the lesson.
Learn the lesson
Do better
& Don’t dwell on it, because you can’t change the past! 

Equally as important, don’t try and cover it up.

Don’t try and ignore it, and hope that the consequences will go away. 

MAN (or WOMAN) UP, address the issue and make the commitment to do better next time.  

This applies all areas of life. Work, home, parenting, friendships, co-parenting…. yes I said co-parenting.

Even if you are in a high conflict situation with a toxic relationship with the ex, I still think it’s important to apologize if you feel like you haven’t gone about something in the right way. 

Even if you’re sure that the reaction to the apology won’t be well received
Even if they treat you like garbage
Even if they would never in a million years apologize to you 

Apologize. 

Why? Because apologizing isn’t ONLY about making amends with the person you have wronged. It’s about the person that you are, and the person you’re becoming.  

… just like “the way people treat you is more about them than it is about you…” The way YOU treat people speaks a lot about you too! 

Right?


 

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